I wasn’t enjoying my final year at Laramie High School in Wyoming so I decided to graduate a semester early. But, to do that I needed a legitimate excuse – the best one, in the eyes of the High School, was starting College early. Luckily, Laramie is the home of the University of Wyoming, so I signed up for a guitar class, and my High School days were over.
I’d taken one semester of guitar in High School, so I knew I would like it, but after a couple lessons with the guitar teacher at UW I was really excited about playing forever…I not only liked it, I loved it! After about 2 months the teacher had all his students do a recital. Even though I hadn’t been playing very long I was really feeling confident and excited to perform. The performance was more than 30 years ago, but I still remember it…the six guitar students, including me, sitting in a semi-circle in the teacher’s practice studio, him sitting across from us. I would be the last one to play, and as each student played their simple piece, I got more and more nervous. By the time it was my turn I was a wreck. I did play my piece, but even before I started my hands were shaking uncontrollably, my mind was forgetting the piece that moments before I knew inside and out. All in all, it was really devastating for me.
After playing I remember leaving the studio and deciding I would never, ever do anything like that again. It was horrible. But, after a week or so I changed my mind. I really loved the music and how it made me feel connected to myself and my heart, and I didn’t want this terrible experience to stop me from moving forward. So, I faced the fear of performing, and ultimately went on to play a number of recitals and a variety of concerts by myself and with other musicians. I still play music today, 30 years later, and can’t image a day when I would stop.
This whole experience brings to mind a recent reading of the Bhagavad Gita. If you are unfamiliar with the story, the warrior Arjuna is trembling with fear in the face of an impending war, and he turns to his friend, Krishna, for help. Krishna is an Avator – a direct manifestation of God. To Arjuna’s surprise, Krishna tells Arjuna that the thing that makes Arjuna great, the reason he is on this Earth, is to be a Warrior, and he should fight. My favorite quote from Krishna, at the moment, is, “The tide of fortune comes in but rarely.” What he is saying to Arjuna is this war is his big chance to really be his True Self.
Of course, the story is a metaphor for the life and the conflicts we face. These conflicts are fortunate opportunities for us to stand strong in our heart, to stand up for what we know is right no matter how much we tremble with fear at the sight of a seemingly unbeatable obstactle before us. The tide of fortune comes in but rarely – congratulations on your impending battle!
Free Yoga Video – John McConnell Yoga – The Tide of Fortune Comes In But Rarely from John McConnell on Vimeo.